Monday, January 26, 2015

Go back to it ...

I am taking us back today.



Back to a human pace ...

Back to honoring the seasons ...

Back to rituals ...

Back to our vulnerable hearts ...

Breathe.



Back to beautiful language ... 

Back to the eyes ..

Back to fine etiquette and the finer arts of being human ...

Back to lingering conversation ...

Back to softness ...

Breathe.



Back to routine ...

Back to making things ...

Back to awkward pauses ...

Breathe.



Back to when every single thing, including a fork, had deep meaning and was beautifully made with your family initials on it by a fellow human ...

Back to investing in and wearing the same exceptional quality clothes  for years ...

Back to investing in things you pass on ...

Back to unfiltered ...

Breathe.



Back to wholesome, respectful farming ...

Back to our Mother ...

Back to our Waters ...

Back to Men ...

Back to Women ...

Breathe.



Back to trusting one another ...

Back to trusting life ...

Back to the sacred child ...

Back to the sacred that is every moment in life ...

Breathe.



Breathe Love in.
Breathe Humanity in.
Breathe Respect in.
Breathe Vulnerable in.
Breathe Slow in.
Breathe Soft in.
Breathe Sustainability in.
Breathe One Human Family in.
Breathe One Animal Family in.
Breathe One Plant Family in. 
Breathe One.



Take a deep Breath in.

Connect to Source. 

You Are Human.

You Are Sacred.

You are a part of everything that ever was, ever is, ever will be.

You Are.


Every day is Magic. It is in you.

Go back to it.

Breathe Magic in.

Breathe Magic out.














Saturday, January 10, 2015

I will not go ...

The first thing that happened was that the power went out.

There I was, on my beloved yoga mat, which I had run to as soon as bebek fell asleep (instantly dropping laundry behind me like a child leaving crumbs in the woods) sweating through my first Vinyassa since being pregnant and giving birth so, like, over a year and the lights went out. Then came that beautiful, peaceful silence that always accompanies a power outage.

Meh, I thought, it won't be long and I continued my practice knowing how precious these practice times are for me. All was done and well, bebek woke up, we ate, we spit up, we played, we peed, repeat.

It is this repeat part, the last part in particular, that alerted me that a teaching was near. Creator was to remind me of something.

So the next thing that happened was bebek deciding to choose this exact power outage moment to embark on a peeing marathon, going through every single beautiful cotton diaper we own, in about 4 hours.  That is 22 diapers. Read that again. 22.

So I did the modern thing and posted something witty on "the social media site" about my situation and faithfully checked for likes and fanciful comments (which I got from my darling friends). Yes, I do that too. I try to catch myself, but it has become a reflex, I am also addicted, just like you.

It was getting cold. And dark. It had completely escaped me in my one season home that it was getting dark outside and that the temperature was a bone chilling -20 and dropping (they were forecasting -38). Until it got cold ...  that brought me back...

I felt more of my humanity with every drop in degree.

Down to my last diaper, a little chilly and wondering what to do, the computer rings (you all know this as a "phone" but I've decided to call it "the computer" because really, actual phone time is so minimal and the rest is just computer stuff ... but that is for another post) and it is none other than the gorgeous, 9 month pregnant momma darling Stephanie, calling to check on us to see how we were doing and to invite us over, rescuing us from impending frigid darkness. I was so touched by that call. The simple, divine humanity, the reaching out from friend to friend. Her voice. Making sure we were okay, checking on us, opening her home to us when she is just a days away from bringing a new magical consciousness into this world. It was so beautiful. It is the best part of us. I thanked her umpteen times and promised to make my way over if the power did not come on in the next half of an hour.

But it did, and I have to say I felt a flash of loneliness because I was looking forward to being all together.

I could still have gone.

But I didn't. Because we don't. These days.

When the power came back on, I wrapped bebek in a bundle as tightly and warmly as I could and the first thing I did was put on thick, warm, woolly socks. I gathered and lit all the beeswax candles I had made in late Fall. I made a list of all the things we would need to cover our human needs in case it happens again.
I boiled water for some hot and steamy tea. I put on a sweater that Axel gave me this year with a beautiful card in which he asked me to imagine him hugging me warmly every time I put it on. So I did.

How I relished that first sip of sweet, steamy red tea...

And I thought about something. At every moment instead of being upset at how long it was taking (it was about 4 hours in the end), I chose to be in gratitude for those people out there working in -20 degree weather to fix the power lines. I reminded myself that it was a blessing to have people that did these things for us. They are invisible to us and we take them for granted. In these days of entitlement and "convenience" it is so easy (and so damaging to our spirit and humanity) to go the other way. The way of anger, entitlement, blame. I had even started down that path before reminding myself of the truth. That these things are not owed to me and I am so grateful that we have these services...

How beautiful is it to have loved ones around you ...

I don't even know how to end this. How to wrap it all up neatly into a bundle ...

I just know that I am grateful. I am connected. I am focused. I am human. I will stay human within this world that wants to take me away from my humanity day by day with chaos and distraction.


I will not go.



Blessings.





Saturday, January 3, 2015

The We ...

Hi dear readers. Happy New Year to you. I've been waiting to share something with you. I did not really feel ready until today, this moment in fact.  So I am here.

Last year, was a year that expanded my human experience beyond measure. 

I danced with life, I danced in magic.

                                                                                                               Art: Leah Dorion

I was pregnant dear readers. I was two selves and now have a beautiful new baby. 
She came to me from the stars and has the whole universe in her eyes. 
Words cannot express my gratitude.

I became a mother. Saying it sounded strange at first. No more.
Mother.

I had no idea.

I couldn't have. It is indescribable. The depth. The miracle. The wonder that is life.
The miracle that is this body. Our body. We. The women. The womb. The breasts.  The milk. The body. The cells. The sacred.

Divinity.

We. The women. The connection to the beginning of time. To the Great Mother. To the Women. The walking miracles. The Light. The magic.


The We. 



The Mother.

The stars are in her.

In the ocean that is her womb.

Life giving milk.

The Stars.

The Universe.

The Women.



The We.





Saturday, December 6, 2014

Life's small moments ...

Now, you have to bear with me here for a moment ... I am a little rusty ... I wanted to share a simple, beautiful moment with you. It happened the other day and arrived unexpectedly, as life's beautiful moments tend to do.

It was an exquisite winter's day. You know the ones I mean. The air was crisp. The sky a clear, cobalt blue and the sun sparkling his rays of light in all directions. So there I was driving along on my merry way and I turned a corner. In one moment, this dazzling white sunlight was upon my face. Bright as bright can be and my face immediately scrunched up.

At first I resisted the squint.

Yes, you did hear me correctly.

I resisted the squint.

Or, more accurately, I restrained it.
Take a moment to take in that word... Do you feel it in your body? In your heart? Look ... listen ... learn ...

I wasn't even aware of doing it for the first little while but then I noticed. Then I asked myself, Oana, what possible reason could you have to resist a perfectly good squint, caused by perfectly brilliant sunlight?

It was then that I let go.

I let all the years of adulthood, censorship and conditioning go and I freed my face.

That's right babies, I freeeed my face! It sounds silly doesn't it. I know it does, but that's just it.

This was my beautiful moment. In that brilliant sunlight for the first time since I can remember, I scrunched my face as much as it wanted to scrunch (which was a heck of a lot), not worrying how my face looked or if was causing wrinkles or if someone in another car was looking at me or if, or if, or if. I just scrunched for the pure sensation of unrestraint. The life joy of being in the sun and allowing my face to do what it wanted to do naturally without my adult interference.

You know, it made me wonder how many other times I restrain my face. Or anything else. There are so many lessons in so many of life's small moments.

I stayed that way for a while dear ones. I drove in the sunlight and set myself free.

It was magical.

Thursday, December 4, 2014

Tippy toeing back in ...

I just wrote something beautiful and then lost it.
It wasn't very long, just a few sentences, but it was beautiful.

It was my way of tippy toeing back in.

And now I can't find the words again.

I will though. Find them, I mean. I can feel them swirling around, peeking through the fog.

It's been a long time since I have been here. 
I wrote something called "The We" but I am not ready to share it in this moment.

I am however, ready to share a crepe recipe.

You know, believe it or not, one of the only times that I make crepes is when my milk has gone sour. People (including myself for a while) tend to throw milk out when it has gone sour but I am telling you, it is the best thing to use for baking or any batter. I have these periods where my body craves milk (natural ewe's, of course) and I buy so much of it (they sell out quickly) that I do not have a chance to go through it before some of it goes sour. Enter: Crepes.

As far as I am concerned, one of the best things to make if your milk has gone sour, is crepes. It gives them a beautiful tang and deep flavour. I use the inimitable Julia Child's recipe and do not look back.

Time to dish.

Julia Child's Master Crepe Recipe




Here is what you need:
  • 1 cup organic flour
  • 1 cup cold (sour - this is mine, not in her master recipe :) ) milk (I use ewe's :))
  • 1 cup cold water
  • 4 large pastured eggs
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 3 tablespoons melted pastured butter, plus more for brushing on pan
 
Here is what to do:


  1. Mix all ingredients together in a blender or with a whisk, until smooth and creamy and then refrigerate for a minimum of two hours. I let mine go overnight because I am usually making them at night and I'm tired and lazy. And so what. Cheers to that.
  2. When you are ready, heat your frying pan over medium heat and brush with melted butter.
  3. Pour in 2 to 3 tablespoons of batter into the center of the pan and then tilt the pan in all directions to cover the bottom evenly. You just want a circle, a crepe'ish circle. You all know what crepes are supposed to look like right?
  4.  Now, you must be ready for instant failure because the first two or three just don't come out. I don't know why, it is just the law of the universe so don't question it. Just go with the flow and carry on and you will achieve crepe glory I promise you.
  5. Cook each one for about 1 minute and then turn it (I use my heat proof hands to do this) and cook briefly on the other side and when ready turn it onto your plate (I have two or three plates because I'm fancy like that).
  6. Brush pan with butter again and repeat all steps.
Now as for the filling, the world is your oyster babies. Sweet, salty, sour - you do your thing darlings. My thing is usually super simple. I like strawberry or raspberry jam or orange marmalade. That and a strong cup of decaf coffee and color me happy.

That is all.

Good night.



Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Go in depth ...



Hi darlings. This link has been making the rounds and I want to share my perspective. So let me get right into it, shall I?

John Oliver is amazing. He's witty, bright, engaging, makes some hilarious and compelling comparisons ( I laughed out loud at the milk thing :)) rocks an accent ... which is why I can see why the video appeals so much. 

Also, Dr. Oz has made himself a really easy target over the last few years by really deviating from an explanation oriented, whole food, bodywork and exercise for a healthy life format, which is how his show initially took off, to what appears as a supplemental infomercial format of his shows today. It is completely irresponsible of him to claim any diet supplement is a miracle anything.

That said, I personally don't take any supplements at all, with the exception of high dose vitamin C when I have a bad cold. I don't juice, I don't take extracts of all the latest fruits, I don't drink green smoothies or anything of that nature. I used to for a few years a long time ago but chose to stop based on personal research and belief. 

As often as possible, I use whole farmed foods, farmed herbal teas & organic fair trade spices as my life force, vitamins and medicine.

I also wholeheartedly believe in science and western medicine and if I have to take an antibiotic or aspirin or something else to help me as a last resort, I absolutely will. 

Now, this video is very well made and highly entertaining. The two main stats were 38 deaths in one year from Tryptophan and 150 from Ephedrine and 16,000 illnesses. Along with the milk comparison of course :). The main point being about lack of regulation and lobbying etc.

I would like to share some statistics with you regarding the very highly regulated pharmaceutical industry. This comes from Harvard University from the Journal of Law, Medicine and Ethics (JLME), edited by Marc Rodwin and supported by the Edmond J. Safra Center for Ethics.

"Every week, about 53,000 excess hospitalizations and about 2400 excess deaths occur in the United States among people taking properly prescribed drugs to be healthier."

Every week.
53,000 hospitalizations.

Every week.
2400 deaths.

Occur in the United States among people taking properly prescribed drugs to be healthier.

I just want you to think about this.
Let it really sink in. Then, think about 38 deaths a year and 150 deaths as mentioned in the video.

Then there is also this statistic:

"Prescription drugs are the 4th leading cause of death."

Here is the article: 

http://www.ethics.harvard.edu/lab/blog/312-risky-drugs

I am writing this because I believe videos like this, entertaining and well produced as they may be, are completely misleading. And the sad part is that in today's bits and bites world, people just consume and share things that are only such a small and incomplete part of the story. 

The pharmaceutical industry has been trying to minimize the natural supplement industry for a very long time because it is a competing industry that has taken many, many dollars away from them. Which is fine, all in a days business matters.

My issue is not with businesses trying to make a buck, even though it costs people their lives sometimes. My issue is with people. It is with people who live unhealthy lives, who eat terrible food from abused animals and an abused earth, drink terrible things, engage with negative and abusive people, have lives that are toxic and leave it up to others to be responsible for their well being. People who don't read labels and for example, think that because it says organic or natural on the label of their their herbal tea does not contain flavour or colour or other things. The list goes on and on in the way we mistreat ourselves and shirk our responsibilities.

The more regulatory bodies we put into place because we are too busy to regulate ourselves, to know on our own where our things come from, the more we destroy our society. The more we destroy ourselves as self sufficient, capable human beings.

We don't need more regulatory bodies. We don't need more supplements, we don't need more variations of the same drugs. We don't need more.

We need to plug back in to our human lives.


We each need to know the farmers who raise the animals for the meat we eat. The farmers who grow the fruits and vegetables. What they put into the soil. The farmers who make our milk and butter. THIS is our medicine. THESE are our supplements. WE need to know what we are putting into our bodies and not because another agency has inspected it and deemed it safe because it has been shown over and over again that doesn't work for the most part in either industry, pharmaceutical or supplement. 





We've also lost faith in our Doctors and Medical system and with good reason. That system, just like many other modern ones, has become the equivalent of mass agriculture. See as many patients as you can, drug 'em up, no time for talking, personal issues, don't remember anything about you, next...in and out as fast as possible...

There is very little humanity left in the medical profession and that needs to come back in. So yes, please give me the flowery language as well as your expertise because it will make me feel better and that's the point.

Anyway, I can go on about this subject for a very long time but at this moment it is making me tired because it is huge and not for one article so I just want to close with this:

Please, please don't rush through your life. Don't fill your brain with 50 different articles in one day. Don't just pick up snippets here and there and adopt them as truth. Go in depth. Read one book instead of non stop media online. Develop your patience. Care about your body. Listen to its needs because you are unique in the world. As much as possible, unless absolutely necessary, don't take things in pill or concentrated forms. Take the time to know what real food is. Cook. Eat well. Love well. Work less. Learn to care and know about what you put into your body and on your body. Take time to sleep. Be less busy. Talk less. Read and know different points of view. Make choices from real understanding that comes from time invested in wanting to know.

Take the time. You are worth it.

That's it for today kids. Nap time. Much love to you all.











Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Looking for the quiet ...

Well, here I am. A little bit against my will. I had to force myself to open this page ... to start typing. It took me a while.

I don't know what to write. Odd way to start a post, I know.

I  have been receiving many inquiries, for which I am so grateful, asking me when I will write again, sending me your e-mail addresses to make sure you are still on my list since you have not received a post in a while ... gently prodding me back to this page ...

I just don't know what to write, so I am writing just that. I hope it doesn't disappoint too much after not having heard from me in a while.

If I am to be completely honest, I have not spent enough time looking for the deeper stories. The long & intricate stories strolling  languidly in my head have been fragmented.  I have been spending too much time condensing them into bites that fit into various status updates. Filling my head with random information, as we do these days from one subject to another ... retaining only bits and pieces ... surface stuff, clear away from depth. I have been avoiding the full stories because they take too much time in one place. Such is our plight these days. We spin and spiral and spew micro bits of ourselves out into the universe and we miss the whole and we're not sure why. We're on autopilot, our index fingers gliding across screens over and over ... opening the same pages constantly, repetitively, looking for the next update, the fragment.
Pavlov's dogs ...

I get caught up in this spinning and whirling once in a while, although I must admit, this one was a long one. I went deep into the intellect, deep into the issues of society, the issues of soul, deep into the myriad human experiences and became discouraged. I got caught up in the collective mind, which today is diseased for the most part. I became lost in the noise that we have become.

I'm looking for the quiet again. It's good to be here.I missed nature, the sound and color of living things.

This winter was long.

Remembering the quiet on the back roads in Ayer's Cliff ...

Thank you for your gentle prodding dear readers, with much love - O
<3