Saturday, December 6, 2014

Life's small moments ...

Now, you have to bear with me here for a moment ... I am a little rusty ... I wanted to share a simple, beautiful moment with you. It happened the other day and arrived unexpectedly, as life's beautiful moments tend to do.

It was an exquisite winter's day. You know the ones I mean. The air was crisp. The sky a clear, cobalt blue and the sun sparkling his rays of light in all directions. So there I was driving along on my merry way and I turned a corner. In one moment, this dazzling white sunlight was upon my face. Bright as bright can be and my face immediately scrunched up.

At first I resisted the squint.

Yes, you did hear me correctly.

I resisted the squint.

Or, more accurately, I restrained it.
Take a moment to take in that word... Do you feel it in your body? In your heart? Look ... listen ... learn ...

I wasn't even aware of doing it for the first little while but then I noticed. Then I asked myself, Oana, what possible reason could you have to resist a perfectly good squint, caused by perfectly brilliant sunlight?

It was then that I let go.

I let all the years of adulthood, censorship and conditioning go and I freed my face.

That's right babies, I freeeed my face! It sounds silly doesn't it. I know it does, but that's just it.

This was my beautiful moment. In that brilliant sunlight for the first time since I can remember, I scrunched my face as much as it wanted to scrunch (which was a heck of a lot), not worrying how my face looked or if was causing wrinkles or if someone in another car was looking at me or if, or if, or if. I just scrunched for the pure sensation of unrestraint. The life joy of being in the sun and allowing my face to do what it wanted to do naturally without my adult interference.

You know, it made me wonder how many other times I restrain my face. Or anything else. There are so many lessons in so many of life's small moments.

I stayed that way for a while dear ones. I drove in the sunlight and set myself free.

It was magical.

Thursday, December 4, 2014

Tippy toeing back in ...

I just wrote something beautiful and then lost it.
It wasn't very long, just a few sentences, but it was beautiful.

It was my way of tippy toeing back in.

And now I can't find the words again.

I will though. Find them, I mean. I can feel them swirling around, peeking through the fog.

It's been a long time since I have been here. 
I wrote something called "The We" but I am not ready to share it in this moment.

I am however, ready to share a crepe recipe.

You know, believe it or not, one of the only times that I make crepes is when my milk has gone sour. People (including myself for a while) tend to throw milk out when it has gone sour but I am telling you, it is the best thing to use for baking or any batter. I have these periods where my body craves milk (natural ewe's, of course) and I buy so much of it (they sell out quickly) that I do not have a chance to go through it before some of it goes sour. Enter: Crepes.

As far as I am concerned, one of the best things to make if your milk has gone sour, is crepes. It gives them a beautiful tang and deep flavour. I use the inimitable Julia Child's recipe and do not look back.

Time to dish.

Julia Child's Master Crepe Recipe




Here is what you need:
  • 1 cup organic flour
  • 1 cup cold (sour - this is mine, not in her master recipe :) ) milk (I use ewe's :))
  • 1 cup cold water
  • 4 large pastured eggs
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 3 tablespoons melted pastured butter, plus more for brushing on pan
 
Here is what to do:


  1. Mix all ingredients together in a blender or with a whisk, until smooth and creamy and then refrigerate for a minimum of two hours. I let mine go overnight because I am usually making them at night and I'm tired and lazy. And so what. Cheers to that.
  2. When you are ready, heat your frying pan over medium heat and brush with melted butter.
  3. Pour in 2 to 3 tablespoons of batter into the center of the pan and then tilt the pan in all directions to cover the bottom evenly. You just want a circle, a crepe'ish circle. You all know what crepes are supposed to look like right?
  4.  Now, you must be ready for instant failure because the first two or three just don't come out. I don't know why, it is just the law of the universe so don't question it. Just go with the flow and carry on and you will achieve crepe glory I promise you.
  5. Cook each one for about 1 minute and then turn it (I use my heat proof hands to do this) and cook briefly on the other side and when ready turn it onto your plate (I have two or three plates because I'm fancy like that).
  6. Brush pan with butter again and repeat all steps.
Now as for the filling, the world is your oyster babies. Sweet, salty, sour - you do your thing darlings. My thing is usually super simple. I like strawberry or raspberry jam or orange marmalade. That and a strong cup of decaf coffee and color me happy.

That is all.

Good night.



Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Go in depth ...



Hi darlings. This link has been making the rounds and I want to share my perspective. So let me get right into it, shall I?

John Oliver is amazing. He's witty, bright, engaging, makes some hilarious and compelling comparisons ( I laughed out loud at the milk thing :)) rocks an accent ... which is why I can see why the video appeals so much. 

Also, Dr. Oz has made himself a really easy target over the last few years by really deviating from an explanation oriented, whole food, bodywork and exercise for a healthy life format, which is how his show initially took off, to what appears as a supplemental infomercial format of his shows today. It is completely irresponsible of him to claim any diet supplement is a miracle anything.

That said, I personally don't take any supplements at all, with the exception of high dose vitamin C when I have a bad cold. I don't juice, I don't take extracts of all the latest fruits, I don't drink green smoothies or anything of that nature. I used to for a few years a long time ago but chose to stop based on personal research and belief. 

As often as possible, I use whole farmed foods, farmed herbal teas & organic fair trade spices as my life force, vitamins and medicine.

I also wholeheartedly believe in science and western medicine and if I have to take an antibiotic or aspirin or something else to help me as a last resort, I absolutely will. 

Now, this video is very well made and highly entertaining. The two main stats were 38 deaths in one year from Tryptophan and 150 from Ephedrine and 16,000 illnesses. Along with the milk comparison of course :). The main point being about lack of regulation and lobbying etc.

I would like to share some statistics with you regarding the very highly regulated pharmaceutical industry. This comes from Harvard University from the Journal of Law, Medicine and Ethics (JLME), edited by Marc Rodwin and supported by the Edmond J. Safra Center for Ethics.

"Every week, about 53,000 excess hospitalizations and about 2400 excess deaths occur in the United States among people taking properly prescribed drugs to be healthier."

Every week.
53,000 hospitalizations.

Every week.
2400 deaths.

Occur in the United States among people taking properly prescribed drugs to be healthier.

I just want you to think about this.
Let it really sink in. Then, think about 38 deaths a year and 150 deaths as mentioned in the video.

Then there is also this statistic:

"Prescription drugs are the 4th leading cause of death."

Here is the article: 

http://www.ethics.harvard.edu/lab/blog/312-risky-drugs

I am writing this because I believe videos like this, entertaining and well produced as they may be, are completely misleading. And the sad part is that in today's bits and bites world, people just consume and share things that are only such a small and incomplete part of the story. 

The pharmaceutical industry has been trying to minimize the natural supplement industry for a very long time because it is a competing industry that has taken many, many dollars away from them. Which is fine, all in a days business matters.

My issue is not with businesses trying to make a buck, even though it costs people their lives sometimes. My issue is with people. It is with people who live unhealthy lives, who eat terrible food from abused animals and an abused earth, drink terrible things, engage with negative and abusive people, have lives that are toxic and leave it up to others to be responsible for their well being. People who don't read labels and for example, think that because it says organic or natural on the label of their their herbal tea does not contain flavour or colour or other things. The list goes on and on in the way we mistreat ourselves and shirk our responsibilities.

The more regulatory bodies we put into place because we are too busy to regulate ourselves, to know on our own where our things come from, the more we destroy our society. The more we destroy ourselves as self sufficient, capable human beings.

We don't need more regulatory bodies. We don't need more supplements, we don't need more variations of the same drugs. We don't need more.

We need to plug back in to our human lives.


We each need to know the farmers who raise the animals for the meat we eat. The farmers who grow the fruits and vegetables. What they put into the soil. The farmers who make our milk and butter. THIS is our medicine. THESE are our supplements. WE need to know what we are putting into our bodies and not because another agency has inspected it and deemed it safe because it has been shown over and over again that doesn't work for the most part in either industry, pharmaceutical or supplement. 





We've also lost faith in our Doctors and Medical system and with good reason. That system, just like many other modern ones, has become the equivalent of mass agriculture. See as many patients as you can, drug 'em up, no time for talking, personal issues, don't remember anything about you, next...in and out as fast as possible...

There is very little humanity left in the medical profession and that needs to come back in. So yes, please give me the flowery language as well as your expertise because it will make me feel better and that's the point.

Anyway, I can go on about this subject for a very long time but at this moment it is making me tired because it is huge and not for one article so I just want to close with this:

Please, please don't rush through your life. Don't fill your brain with 50 different articles in one day. Don't just pick up snippets here and there and adopt them as truth. Go in depth. Read one book instead of non stop media online. Develop your patience. Care about your body. Listen to its needs because you are unique in the world. As much as possible, unless absolutely necessary, don't take things in pill or concentrated forms. Take the time to know what real food is. Cook. Eat well. Love well. Work less. Learn to care and know about what you put into your body and on your body. Take time to sleep. Be less busy. Talk less. Read and know different points of view. Make choices from real understanding that comes from time invested in wanting to know.

Take the time. You are worth it.

That's it for today kids. Nap time. Much love to you all.











Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Looking for the quiet ...

Well, here I am. A little bit against my will. I had to force myself to open this page ... to start typing. It took me a while.

I don't know what to write. Odd way to start a post, I know.

I  have been receiving many inquiries, for which I am so grateful, asking me when I will write again, sending me your e-mail addresses to make sure you are still on my list since you have not received a post in a while ... gently prodding me back to this page ...

I just don't know what to write, so I am writing just that. I hope it doesn't disappoint too much after not having heard from me in a while.

If I am to be completely honest, I have not spent enough time looking for the deeper stories. The long & intricate stories strolling  languidly in my head have been fragmented.  I have been spending too much time condensing them into bites that fit into various status updates. Filling my head with random information, as we do these days from one subject to another ... retaining only bits and pieces ... surface stuff, clear away from depth. I have been avoiding the full stories because they take too much time in one place. Such is our plight these days. We spin and spiral and spew micro bits of ourselves out into the universe and we miss the whole and we're not sure why. We're on autopilot, our index fingers gliding across screens over and over ... opening the same pages constantly, repetitively, looking for the next update, the fragment.
Pavlov's dogs ...

I get caught up in this spinning and whirling once in a while, although I must admit, this one was a long one. I went deep into the intellect, deep into the issues of society, the issues of soul, deep into the myriad human experiences and became discouraged. I got caught up in the collective mind, which today is diseased for the most part. I became lost in the noise that we have become.

I'm looking for the quiet again. It's good to be here.I missed nature, the sound and color of living things.

This winter was long.

Remembering the quiet on the back roads in Ayer's Cliff ...

Thank you for your gentle prodding dear readers, with much love - O
<3





Monday, January 13, 2014

A tiny light shines on a surface we least expect ...

There are days, in which I am pierced with feeling
Not sharply, which contradicts
That is my life
A sort of infiltration that sweeps over me
Reminding me of the beauty
Reminding me of the fragility

It fills me with sweetness and sorrow simultaneously
It asks of me
It shows me possibilities and time
It asks me to look
I am sometimes afraid to open fully
I feel my human mind will be overwhelmed

I am saddened by what I fear we have lost
Then
I catch glimpses

Brief gifts of that familiar thing that connects us
That we recognize

There are days, in which I curse the same feelings
The ones I don't like
The ones I am afraid of
The ones that remind me of loss
Of my inability to control things

And despite all illusion of choice, choice is temporary, and on life's terms
Choice is yours until it ends
Until life reminds
That time is fleeting

Grace
Is
Eternal

We get so close, a glimpse
Walking a surface
There is recognition

It is time to tell stories again
To each other

To listen to the sounds of this beautiful human voice
Our voice
The one we share
The one most of us have forgotten

It is time to sing again
To dance
To touch
To look into the eyes of our friends an fellow humans
To stand close again
Together

The only choice we have is love

Sometimes, a tiny light shines on a surface we least expect
Sometimes that surface is our soul

I ask, how can I heal when I am being healed
I answer


- Oana Silaghi-Bedikyan


Thank you for reading dear readers. Happy New Year.

Saturday, November 30, 2013

Stories told ...



“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” Maya Angelou

Hi dear readers. This is where I have been the last little while.



On mountain tops doing yoga ...
In supermarket parking lots looking up ...

Crashing wedding parties with great friends ...

In awe ...

Looking up at the moon ...

More awe ...

Looking up through teepees ...

Walking and breathing ...

Watching seasons ...


With my Heron friend ...

Just looking up ...

Thursday, September 12, 2013

The only truth is love ...

I have been thinking a lot about the state of us lately. Us. You and me.

I generally do not read the news, or watch it for that matter. I rely on conversations with people to inform me of things that are going on on the world. I do this because when I keep up with current affairs through the news system we have cultivated, I feel hopeless. I become overwhelmed with all the terrible things we are doing to our earth and to each other. I actually think this is the point of much of media. To dishearten us and to make us feel as if things are so huge, so bad that what we do as individuals, can make no difference. We rely on faulty governments, run by people with agendas that have lost heart ... lost sight. Sight of the fact that we are one family, living in one house. A living family sharing one living earth.

"God gives us love; something to love he lends us." Alfred, Lord Tennyson

Often times, we only realize what is important to us, when things we take for granted or love, are taken away.

We take for granted the fragile structure upon which civility depends.

We fight amongst ourselves and try to prove our points and impose our views on others. We are convinced we are right and try to silence or hurt those who differ.

Between agriculture disasters, human rights, technological espionage, pharmaceutical & agro intimidation, climate issues, mass extinctions, educational policies, population crisis ... I don't know where to turn.

We take and take. We pollute. We fight We destroy. We consume.

There is no way out for us. 
We are too many. Too damaged.

This is how I feel when I watch and read the news. I get caught up in it once or twice a year.

So I turn it all off and I go back in time.

I go and make bread with soaked flour. I make sauerkraut and take comfort in the fact that organisms older than man are still here and doing their thing for my kraut to be sour. I talk to my friends and family. I hug my husband and thank Creator for the privilege. I squeeze Napa. I fast to remind myself of hunger. I fast to slow down. I do yoga to remind myself of my body and the miracle of strength and movement. I meditate. I go see my farmer and butcher and fishmonger and listen to their wise words. I engage in my community. I work with my crystals and show tremendous gratitude for my beautiful clients. I knit. I turn off my computer. I garden. I scale down.

What I realize, is that there is no other way. We have to live smaller lives. Slower lives. Lives with much less consumer choice. Lives with depth and meaning. Lives where we are considerate and care for each other and all that lives on the planet we share. Lives where we care about the welfare of the animals and plants that we eat. Families and friendships have to mean something again. We have to be able to tolerate discomfort in relationships. We have to bring back eccentricity. Character. Honor. Valor. Curiosity. Respect. Diversity. Love. 

Could we even fathom only taking as much as we need?

We have to fundamentally understand that we are one unit. There is no separation. When we harm others we harm ourselves. When we silence others, we silence ourselves.  When we harm our planet we harm our home. The only one we have.

We have to love. To love our home, and all things in it. There is no other way.

The only truth is love.

It all starts, and ends, there.

Alright. I need a hot chocolate.

Join me will you?

Time to dish.

Cocoa with Saffron for your Soul

Here is what you need:
  • 1/4 cup of fairly traded dark cacao
  • A cinnamon stick
  • A pinch of saffron 
  • 1 liter of whole milk, full fat please 
  • Maple syrup to sweeten to your liking
Here is what to do:

Quite simply, bring the milk to a slow simmer & mix in all your ingredients. Allow to simmer together for about 10 minutes, stirring to make sure there are no cocoa clumps. Then remove the cinnamon stick and drink and contemplate what you love.

Peace & Love

Oana